I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize