But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
