they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
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I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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