look no pants
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Randomize
