I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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