i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I am spending my child support on dildos
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
