I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Help. Why am I so naked?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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