is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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