We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
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