this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize