I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
