a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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