I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize