life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Just high enough for therapy.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
