he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
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