i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
