At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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