id be glad to
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
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