im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
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