They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
