I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.