So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize
