Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up http://tfl.nu/y2zz
  Replies (1) Good night (769) Bad night (1166)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA! http://tfl.nu/7pku
  Replies (348) Good night (44262) Bad night (4766)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging. (504): Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER http://tfl.nu/kpd3
  Replies (38) Good night (6092) Bad night (647)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug http://tfl.nu/z2q2
  Replies (6) Good night (1094) Bad night (4770)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'. http://tfl.nu/u94d
  Replies (9) Good night (6924) Bad night (805)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there. http://tfl.nu/497c
  Replies (8) Good night (3257) Bad night (1007)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears. http://tfl.nu/pc9j
  Replies (11) Good night (2639) Bad night (809)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it. http://tfl.nu/1dic
  Replies (9) Good night (3128) Bad night (1210)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad. http://tfl.nu/pu3r
  Replies (7) Good night (1564) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (229): View more from Georgia

  No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (229): No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional. http://tfl.nu/bawb
  Replies (8) Good night (2499) Bad night (1070)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up. http://tfl.nu/b02w
  Replies (10) Good night (1043) Bad night (715)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.

  (1-310): View more from California

  Make one for john too.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake. (1-310): Make one for john too. http://tfl.nu/lihh
  Replies (3) Good night (1257) Bad night (1493)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"

  (1-512): View more from Texas

  Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??" (1-512): Yeah no more flaming everclear shots. http://tfl.nu/vc2f
  Replies (10) Good night (840) Bad night (1447)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (239): I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night. http://tfl.nu/o908
  Replies (4) Good night (535) Bad night (265)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week http://tfl.nu/qjgk
  Replies (2) Good night (452) Bad night (368)

Randomize