Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
