I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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