you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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