My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Randomize
