im having a threesome with these popsicles
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize
