at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"