Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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