I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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