also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
