I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize