i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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