i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
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