ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
