Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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