So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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