New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
