we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I just found a bag of teeth...
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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