You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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