The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Randomize
