Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
