Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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