i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize