Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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