What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
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