At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
