Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
