Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
